The scene takes place in a gray room without a window.

A young woman dressed in black sits at a table, looking stern.

“Bring in the first accused!” “

NATIONAL INDIGNITY

A sickly man in his sixties enters.

“Mr. Jean-Claude Tartan, your daughter told us that on July 1st, you watched a movie in your living room. Do you remember which feature film you watched with your wife at 9:36 p.m.?

– The Fall of the American Empire, by Denys Arcand.

– With which actors?

– Uh … Rémy Girard, Pierre Curzi …

– AND MARIPIER MORIN! Do you know that this dangerous misfit was sentenced to exile and national indignity three weeks ago, and that any visual work representing her should be returned to the Ministry of Culture to be burned there?

You are sentenced to a six month suspension without pay!

Number two ! “

A bald, paunchy man in his fifties enters the room.

“Mr. Sébastien Beauvois, our surveillance cameras show that on May 30, at 3.32 pm, you took the metro. You looked at a young woman sitting in front of you.

– I don’t remember … So what?

– And so, you looked at her for 5.7 seconds, whereas the acceptable period to look at a woman in public transport is 2.3 seconds! And there was a 7 inch gap between your thighs!

Six months suspension without pay!

Number three! “

CULTURE THIEF

A septuagenarian between the bowed head.

“Mr. Albert Tremblay, your two grandsons have written to us to tell us that you like to sunbathe on the roof of your building. Is it true ?

– Uh, yes, I like that …

– BLACKFACE! In addition, we have a copy of a letter you wrote to your cousin, in which you invite him to “smoke the peace pipe” …

– Yes, we were angry, and …

– CULTURAL APPROPRIATION! Six months suspension without pay!

Number four! “

A woman in her forties enters …

“Rose-Marie Trépanier, is it true that you said on the radio on April 23, at 5:24 pm, that you were proud to have lost 56 pounds?

– Yes, it was a health show and …

– GROSSOPHOBIA! It is forbidden to say that you feel better when you lose weight, it is discriminatory for those who suffer from the disease of obesity!

Number five! “

A black dwarf in a wheelchair enters …

“Violine Jean, according to your wife, who contacted us on our whistleblower line, 1-800-STOOLE, during the last LGBTQ2 League plenary assembly, you asked: What time is it?

– Yes and so ? I do not understand…

– SEXISM ! GRAMMATICAL PATRIARCHY! WHAT TIME IS IT?

Six months suspension without pay!

Number six! “

A man and a woman dressed in black storm into the room and immobilize the young woman sitting at the table.

“Comrade Karine Charlebois-Tanguay, senior analyst at the Ministry of Culture, according to our neuro-analytical machines, you dreamed of Kevin Parent yesterday!

Six months suspension without pay! “

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