The company's manager, 42, reveals the "disappointment" of not being able to consume his marriage

An executive of the company who removed his testis just revealed how he destroyed his sexual desire so much that he could not consume his marriage.

Ben Twemlow, 42, was diagnosed with cancer after noticing that one of his testicles had swollen to triple its normal size and become painful.

The day he was told he had the disease, he proposed to his current wife, Andrea, and the couple got married in Las Vegas on December 27, 2017.

But Mr. Twemlow, from Chatham in Kent, could not have sex with his wife until three days after the marriage, because his libido had been reduced to the test.

Used to having sex "three to five times a week", Mr. Twemlow was devastated and felt depressed because of the sudden drop in testosterone after surgery.

The help and support of the woman he loves, however, helped Mr. Twemlow on the road to recovery and the couple is now "back where they were".

Ben Twemlow and his wife Andrea, could not have sex on their wedding night, December 27, 2017, because his libido was completely diminished after surgery to remove his testis right to treat cancer

Mr Twemlow realized that something was wrong when his testicle was swollen and painful – his doctor initially thought it was an infection but when the antibiotics did not help he was sent for the ultrasound scans that they revealed the true diagnosis

Mr Twemlow proposed to his two-year-old English-mate teacher when confronting his mortality made him realize the importance of marrying the woman he loved.

Fortunately, he was given all clear after a successful orchiectomy procedure, in which his right testicle was removed in August 2017.

But although the cancer was gone, Mr. Twemlow's trial was not over.

"After surgery, my sexual desire completely vanished due to the sudden loss of testosterone," said the construction company's offer writer.

"I fell into a pit of feeling very low and depressed for a lot of time.

"Before the cancer, I had sex three to five times a week with Andrea, but then it was very far from my mind and we would have been lucky if we had made love once every two weeks."

But his loss of libido did not dampen his desire to marry the woman he loved.

On December 27, 2017, four months after his operation, the couple joined the Lucky Little Chapel in Las Vegas.

Mr Twemlow said that he and his wife were having sex "three or five times a week", but the physical and emotional damage of having removed his testicle meant that it went down to twice a month

The couple married in Las Vegas last Christmas after Mr. Twemlow proposed the same day he was diagnosed with cancer, saying that facing the possibility of death made him understand what was important in life

When, that night, they jumped to bed at the New York hotel in New York, despite the bright lights of the casino capital, there was no electricity between them and, instead of consuming their marriage, they fell asleep. .

The evening after, after a repeated performance – or the lack of one – Mrs. Twemlow urged her new husband to stop worrying about sex and simply to enjoy the holidays.

And, on the third night, thanks to Mrs. Twemlow's compassion and thoughtful nature, Mr. Twemlow said his self-esteem was restored, his libido returned and he finally made love with his wife.

Speaking to support Movember, a movement dedicated to raising awareness on male health and in particular on male tumors, Mr. Twemlow said: "Andrea and I are a very loving couple.

"We had a lot of sex before, but your wedding night is the night that should be special, a night to remember.

The Twemlow couple (pictured on holiday in Lanzarote, Spain) had been together for two years before proposing, and will return to Las Vegas this Christmas to celebrate their one-year anniversary


Rob Cornes, a cancer-nurse nurse at the Orchid cancer care organization, previously told MailOnline of the dangers.

He wrote: "About 90% of male sex hormone testosterone is produced by the testes.

"Testosterone is the hormone responsible for male secondary characteristics such as muscle growth, bone, hair structure, deep voice and a general feeling of well-being in men.

"It is also responsible for sperm growth and the removal of a testis should not affect overall testosterone levels, sexual desire or ability to have an erection or fertility.

"Provided that the remaining testis is healthy, it should do the job of both.

"If it is performed for testicular cancer and subsequent chemotherapy is necessary, men will be advised to deposit the sperm because chemotherapy can cause temporary sterility.

"Men who lose both testicles are likely to have erection problems because of reduced testosterone levels, and they will not be able to naturally generate a child.

"When testosterone levels are minimal, men often experience a loss of libido, well being and can experience lethargy, low mood and depression, weight gain and sometimes breast swelling.

"Testosterone replacement therapy will be needed in this situation, which can be given as injections, gels or patches, but it may take a few weeks for the levels to normalize."

"But it was not and this was disappointing for both, because I love this woman more than anything else in the world.

"Fortunately, however, thanks to his love and support, on the third night of our honeymoon everything changed and we made love as if nothing had ever been wrong."

Mr Twemlow's problems began when, one morning in June 2017, he woke up to find that his right testicle was swollen up to three times its normal size.

Said by his family doctor, it was most likely only one infection, he had been given a course of antibiotics, but they had little effect on his enlarged testicle.

Suffering from almost constant pain in the groin, especially when using the pedals of the car while driving, Mr. Twemlow was not improving.

Then, last August, he went for an ultrasound and was amazed to hear that, instead of an infection, he had cancer.

After Mr. Twemlow (pictured with Mrs. Twemlow on holiday in Lanzarote) removed his testicle, felt pain and for several months – especially in the winter months – due to scars and bruises inside and outside. external of his scrotum

The Twemlow spouses were married in Las Vegas months after his diagnosis. He said: "I just looked at Andrea and I realized that she was the woman I wanted to stay with for the rest of my life"

"I could not believe it," Mr. Twemlow said. "It had never occurred to me that it could be something so serious.

"As a man, you are told to look for small nodules on the surface of your balls, so having a swollen ball does not seem consistent with cancer."

That evening, the couple tried to make a brave face and pretend that everything was normal, ordering a take-away and looking at Pointless.


Testicular cancer most commonly affects men aged 15 to 45 years, with about 2,200 cases diagnosed each year.

Approximately 47% of men diagnosed with the disease will be under the age of 35.

Despite being a relatively rare form of cancer, it is one of the most treatable.

If captured at an early stage, men can expect a high cure rate with 98 percent of sick without disease one year after treatment.

If caught at any time, 96% of men will still be alive 10 years after their treatment.

Unlike many cancers, there are few known risk factors for testicular cancer.

Men born with an unscrupulous testicle are at slightly increased risk. About 10% of patients will have a history of this condition.

Having a testicular cancer brother or father can also increase a man's risk.

Some research has suggested that the disease is slightly more common in men with fertility problems and that men with HIV are more likely to develop testicular cancer.

Signs and symptoms include:

  • a small pea-shaped nodule, which in most cases is painless
  • a dragging sensation
  • swelling or tenderness at the breast
  • back pain caused by swollen lymph nodes in the back

Source: Orchid, Fighting Male Cancer

"It was a strange atmosphere and there was so much going on my mind," Mr Twemlow said.

"But all of a sudden I just looked at Andrea and I realized that this was the woman I wanted to be with for the rest of my life – so I asked the question then and there.

"I knew that 95 percent of testicular cancer patients survived, but the thought of that five percent that does not really bring your mortality to your home.

"It makes you appreciate all the things you have in life."

Things moved quickly after his diagnosis and he was booked for an operation to remove his testicle just three days later.

The operation was a success, but despite his best efforts to mentally prepare himself for the sight of his new employees, Mr Twemlow was still shocked by his "half-empty leather bag".

With scars and bruises inside and outside his scrotum, he experienced pain for several months after surgery.

It was particularly painful during the colder winter months, when his scrotum stiffened.

And not only has her sexual desire suffered, but making love could be too painful to live.

But even after the wounds had healed, he was left without a libya because of the physical and emotional damage caused by his treatment against cancer.

Mr Twemlow is now eager to share his experience to encourage men to seek help to get an early diagnosis and to talk with their partners about all their fears.

"In the course of my recovery, Andrea was incredibly patient with me, getting me out of myself and expressing what I was experiencing," he said.

"Giving me time and understanding was what was most important to get back to where we were before."

Mr Twemlow believes it is not uncommon for men to delay a doctor's visit because they are uncomfortable discussing issues related to their sexual organs.

He said: "Men can be embarrassed to visit doctors for this sort of thing, but when you think your life may be at risk, it's madness to stop it.

Mr Twemlow said that his wife's support was critical to his recovery from the disease and is encouraging other men to speak openly with their partners and to have any concerns checked by a doctor

"Removing a testicle can make you feel like you're no longer a man, especially when, moreover, you feel like you can not have sex.

"But you're still a man like you before and, more importantly, you're alive.

"I'm so grateful to be here again, because the surviving cancer meant that I was with the love of my life for, hopefully, many more years to come."

The Twemlow spouses now plan to return to Las Vegas for their first anniversary next month.

On this visit to the high-octane city, he hopes to hit the jackpot in and out of the bedroom.

"Now I feel great and our love is back as before," he said.

"I want to make the woman I love happy and our anniversary in Las Vegas will happily make us both happy."

The Movember Foundation is the leading charity dedicated to changing the face of male health in the UK and around the world.

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